Britny (narutoninjagirl) wrote in amaashi_art,
Britny
narutoninjagirl
amaashi_art

Cheats!

This was a joke between me and my friends.

Invisibility
 
Get a space shuttle, and atomic bomb, and a mime from the drug dealer in Moe’s barbershop. Fly to El Paso and talk to Donkey Kong. Trade him the space shuttle and the mime for the bazooka my 3rd grade art teacher used to shoot dinosaurs in the femur. Then walk down to Avenue X and talk to James Bond. He will end up giving you Chuck Norris’s address. The wind will carry you to New York. Take the stairs to the top of the Empire State Building. You now see Jackie Chan. You two must jump off the building while singing the theme song to Mission Impossible. You will land safely on Britney Spears’s legs. Summersault away as she will now randomly self-combust. Jesus will crawl out of her stomach and will grant you one wish. Ask for him to buy you a Taco Bell combo. Once teleported to Taco Bell, Barney will try to hypnotize you into singing and dancing the Macarena. Shove the atomic bomb down his throat and run back home to see the report on NBC. Throw yourself out the second story window. This will give you invisibility to out run the cops.

Super speed
 
Pull your pants down to your ankles; get in the elevator while singing, “It’s Raining Men”, then, trip down the flight of stairs while spelling ‘PENIS’ backward 10 times. Drink 2 gallons of milk and talk to Kakashi in Yiddish. He will reply in German pig Latin and give you $49 to go beat up the emo kid in my gym class. The Emo Kid will cut off your left arm with a machete, and then stab you through the heart, thus turning you into a Mexican vampire. Steal the $49 and buy an emu. Run down the middle of the street carrying the emu while trying to put of a floral dress your aunt Annie bought you for your 16th birthday. Tag team against Michael Jackson. Leave the emu to finish the fight, so you can go steal the soul of a Canadian vending machine. Feeling a little mischievous, you walk by the SeXXX shop to see Jesus buying a strap on and a feather duster. You steal his toga and mail it to Hitler who is on vacation in Wyoming. You turn around and see Chuck Norris bitch slapping Darth Vader. Kill Chuck Norris with a peanut and 3 coke cans. Darth Vader will reward you with a pink light saber and super speed.

One Life Up
 
Sneak into the White house at 2:54 am. Go to the Oval office and wake up King Arthur. Give him a rubber mallet and he will summon Johnny Cash to bring you a pair of stylish blue jeans and a box of broken crayons. Oprah’s disembodied head will rush through the door followed by thousands of rabid ninja wolverines. King Arthur and Johnny Cash will commence to do the ho-down while you stab a hole in the wall big enough to climb through. Open the door and go down the hall while trying to evade a deadly mass of SasuNaru fan girls. Punch a 5 yr old in the face 63 ½ times. They will drop a pack of hot pink eyeliner. Run to the nearest women’s bathroom and trade Green day the eyeliner for ONE LIFE UP!
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